Sel de Mer
by Hawkflight7
Summary: "It's okay not to be okay."


**Sel de Mer**

 **Summary: "It's okay not to be okay."**

 **For The Fanfiction World Adventures II [Round 6: Queensland, Australia]**

 **This is merely a taste of what happens after Promesse Aveugle. I'm planning a longer fic that will clear up the time jump between the two and go beyond this one as well.**

Her fingers curled into the iron railing as the wind whipped around her. It sent her curls dancing around her, a few strands wrapping around her face as the air couldn't figure out which way it wanted to go. Hermione didn't bother to move the strands away, they would just be back there in a few seconds even if she did make the effort.

The waves below were crashing against the cliff face, roaring across the sea before they met the rock in a crescendo. It was too far down for her to feel the sea foam, but she knew it would be white and fuzzy, like the fizz at the top of a glass of beer. It was something she was accustomed to with Rabastan partaking in the cheap beverage instead of the expensive wine his brother preferred. Not that she took much notice of what Rodolphus liked. She had been sure to get better quality beer though, so this time she could drink with Rabastan. To be honest... she had a sinking feeling that she was going to need it after Ron and Harry left.

Right now they were searching the lighthouse on the Lestrange property that she had snuck them into. It had something to do with Sirius' death and his brother Regulus. Apparently he had left some item in each Death Eater's home that was meant to incriminate them so their house would be seized when the Dark Lord was 'captured.'

Well, things didn't go exactly like that. The aurors hadn't been thorough enough in their search, or the Lestrange brothers had found it - most likely Rabastan, if that was the case, he was the one that used the lighthouse - since their property was never seized by a Voldemort fearing Ministry.

It was suppose to be a dark artifact and for whatever reason - grief, probably - Harry was convinced that it would let him achieve retribution for Sirius' death. With things as they were they would use it to 'falsely' incriminate another follower of the Dark Lord. Hopefully it would make people realize that Voldemort was still a threat, with the current Minister trying to keep everything under wraps people were panicking. They weren't stupid, they knew something was wrong, but feeding them lies wasn't the answer.

Hermione agreed with that, she didn't necessarily agree with what Harry was planning, though. It was reckless, even for him, but he wasn't listening to her as much these days.

Her eyelids fluttered closed as the wind tugged at her hair. It was just like the last time she had been with him...

 _Rabastan's hot breath kept burning her neck as he held her hair up and away from the top length of her spine. His hand had curled into a fist around her hair, and he kept it pinned above her on the headboard as she fought down the urge to shiver as he crouched over her. "Do I scare you?"_

 _"...yes," she murmured, face buried in the rough dry pillow._

 _It wasn't so much him, but her. Not that she could put such things into words. It scared her how much she wanted him. She didn't understand what kept drawing her to him, that had drawn her to..._ this.

 _Another convulsion ran through her body and she felt his hand press into the small of her back._

 _What was worse was that despite the magnetic pull she felt for him, she didn't have the strength to pull away. She wasn't sure if she could survive the outcome if she didn't manage to break the habit._

 _"Celine." He pressed his lips to the top of her spine. "It's okay not to be okay."_

...she wished he was already here.

Hermione turned around, reaching out for the door and turning the knob. She escaped her assailant - the wind - ducking down so as not to bump her head against the low opening. In a few steps she fell onto the bed, _her_ bed, really. This was where she would be staying, where Rabastan would appear when he came back from his mission. He would expect her to be here, likely in a similar position.

A knock sounded on the door after what seemed like hours had passed, but must have only been minutes as she waited for the crack of apparation to fill the room. "Hermione?" The door cracked open and she found herself curling her legs up to her chest without thinking about it. "We found the artifact. We'll be leaving now." Ron's voice came through the crack.

She had to draw a breath in and hold it, then breathe out slowly before she uncurled herself, sitting up on the bed. "Wait, I'll turn on the light." _So we can say goodbye properly_ , she didn't dare add. Hermione wouldn't be seeing them again until after the holidays when she could come back to Hogwarts to play her part.

"No, I'd much rather you didn't." Her hand froze, brushing the top of the dresser that sat next to the bed, were her wand lay just out of reach. She could feel the magic thrumming though the wood and against her hand, barely a centimeter away.

 _What?_

Her mouth wouldn't move, she felt like his words had just turned her to stone. How could he...? Did she just... not matter to him anymore...? Like this...? The way she was?

Hermione bit her tongue to stop herself from screaming at him, raging and throwing spells at the door. "I... I just..."

" _What?_ "she hissed.

"I can't... see you like that." The door slammed shut and she slumped against the bed, laying motionless on the covers.

 _Wait a second.  
_ _Why do you care?  
_ _What they think of you,  
_ _When you're all alone?  
_ _/ By yourself /  
_ _Shine the light  
_ _On whatever's worse  
_ _/ Perfection /  
_ _Is the disease  
_ _~Pageant the pain away~  
_ _This time I'm gonna take the crown  
_ _Without falling down  
_ _Down  
_ _down._

 **prompts used: (word) Magnetic, (action) Pulling someone's hair, (word) Wind, and (dialogue) "Wait, I'll turn on the light." / "No, I'd much rather you didn't"**

 **The ending lyrics come from two different songs that I merged for this fic.**


End file.
